Foncused?!

My trainer from AT&T loves to use that word so much..."foncused". Something she would use when she sees one of us with a hazy gaze, an unsmiling smirk and a knot on the forehead. "Are you Foncused?" she would ask.

I want to answer her this very moment. Yes, I'm very foncused.

I hate it when well-kept secrets are unveiled in front of me. I hate it the most if the secrets are not mine. The more I don't know how to handle the sudden knowledge that seems way too trivial before can actually hurt a lot of people. The way it hurt me. Yes, I felt more than betrayed. I felt I was sold out by a good friend. Or a supposedly good friend.

As I've told Pao, right now, I'm still struggling with myself more than anything else. I have to deal with myself first before I can deal with her. I was the victim, just like Pao, but she managed to make everyone believe she was the underdog. So where do I go from there? Play the perpetrator? Or make everyone believe I'm a victim of her devious plan? Would anyone believe me?