Negate The Ordinary

Many times I've tried to see past the familiar person that I see everytime I look at a mirror. I'm one of those who believes in knowing oneself first. Of being totally aware of one's spirit and mind. Of internalizing the being and in delving inward for greater purpose and knowledge.

I'm not good at it. Really. I'm still kinda lost. But I'm not one to lose hope on myself.

What I'm tryni to say is that, I don't want an ordinary life. I don't want a simple life. I want something different. I want to be challenged. I want pressure. I want to feel extreme pain and I want extreme exhiliration. I want something so intense it would be almost tangible. I want movement and chaos. I want too much and overbearing control. I want a crazy and beautiful life.

Now do I make sense? That's it! I don't want to make sense!!!

I may be doomed after all...