Pain in my A@$

Last week I visited my bestfriend.

Before I came to the visiting part I just want to make kwento that that morning I met up with Jane ans we went super shopping at the mega-sale. I bought clotheses (? hahaha), sandals and bags. And of course baby things. And by that I meant the big and bulky kind, like mattress, pillows, comforters, towels etc. Which would bring my story back to my bestfriend.

You see, she just gave birth a month ago. She's unmarried, with a long-time boyfriend (as in they've been together forever), jobless, who just happen to be the mother of Kyan, a cute little guy who came out after just 6 months and 3 weeks. A very eager boy indeed. And because of Kyan's impatience, he suddenly gave his parents a very big headache, a headache amounting to P96,000 (as of last week's figures).

I on the other hand, am suffreing from the very normal first heartbreak (which is kinda late considering I'm about to turn 23 this December) and a very potent family problem. I'm currently an out of school youth (I'm still considered a youth right?), with an out of school brother, a Goth inspired sister and a pair of jobless parents. We just had our PLDT line cut last weekend due to an outstanding balance (which is very minimal to compared to Kyan's bills, hehehehe) and lost our cable connection weeks ago.

And so we talked. We talked through the night, though she's sleepy and I tired, we talked and cried and talked and laughed. How we miss laughing together!

All throughout the night, I was the one who cried more. I was the one in pain. She was more amiable. Maybe she was trying to be strong for the both of us, or maybe she really is much stronger than I am. But then one she said something that made me wonder more, made me more scared ot what's to come, more paranoid.

We're only turning 23, Hanne. Umpisa pa lang 'to. Marami pang problema na mas malaki ang darating. Marami pang mangyayari masama.

To that all I can say was,

Paano na tayo? Ano na mangyayari sa atin?

After that, I told myself, hindi ako papahuli na buhay. I was ready to leave my job months back. I had 3 resignation letter dated December, January and March. But I told myself, hindi ako papahuli ng buhay, I'll survive, and I'll leave on my own time on my own terms. I couldn't believe I was bale to stay here for more than a year now. I guess, I'll just need to apply the same principle in my life from now on. I have my bestfriend to walk with anyway, hopefully she'll be there for the next 20 plus years.