Since Then

For most people, their average life span per call center lasts only for a few months, a year if they're fortunate. I'm not like that. I've been here for 2 years, 7 months and 25 days to date. I'm not so sure if I want out.

So many times I've thought of leaving. First because of the toxicity of my old account and my body just can't take the constant verbal abuse I get, it began to translate itself physically. Second was because of conflicts with the superiors that I used to have, I just felt that they're out there to get me and I got pretty scared. Fate stepped in moments before I finally gave up. I was moved to another department. Somewhere off the phone and with a new manager. Life was good then, so I stalled my plans of leaving.

Months after that, at the time I told myself I'd finally leave, I got a promotion. It was my way out of being an agent forever. And I took the chance, I gambled and stayed even when I've been dead set into leaving the company for months by then.

A few months into the new job, the amount of work just became unbearable. I was ready to crack under the pressure, and so I decided to leave once again. I never took the opportunity though. I have planted my roots too deep in the company already and the thought of exhanging everything for a couple of thousands was not enough. I told myself, if I'm having a hard time managing my workload, maybe I ain't good at managing my time and that I may be lacking some skills still. So I developed myself. Soon, the tasks became menial. I became bored after another half a year.Until one day, I felt I learned all I can learn about my post and that it's time to move on. To another company, to another account, to another set of metrics. The moment I sent my resume out though, I got transferred and was given a new task. I had to pass all the calls and offers that I got because I realized just how little I really know. This is a new world that I am to discover. And I stayed.

I'm again bugged by that need to move. More than anything else, I think I've finally exhausted all reasons except one. The most important reason. That one thing why we are working and why we all can't seem to stop. The money. I know that I've accomplished more than what's been expected. I am beyond anyone's expectations, as a matter of fact. I do not hide the fact that it is here that I learned all those things, but I too know now that I am worth more than they are willing to give me. It started with my simple request to be appraised. As it says in the company handbook that there would be an annual appraisal that would set the annual increase. I've been in the position for a year and a half. And no bloody appraisal nor a raise. I changed post already, and no raise still. My workload grew exponentially as my skills developed...and yet I was never appraised. I feel cheated. I deserve better.

I know I still got about ten thousands of other things to learn and understand in my line of work. I can do it here or I can do it somewhere else. The question is, would they give me my worth in peso? Would they give me what's due to me, the money and the amount of respect I am warranted? Would they realize that I am a keeper?

Because I know I am.